Hey ChatGPT: Write me a nice novel

I've been messing around with ChatGPT, the AI chatbot that promises to take any writing project and remove the need for human involvement.

As a blogger, I’m excited about this technology. Once I’m finally freed from this clacking keyboard, I’ll have lots more time to stare moodily into the middle distance. Or perhaps take a shower.

Basically, you sign up with the website, enter a couple of ideas and let the ChatGPT do the rest. In the example below, I asked for about 400 words on film noir and one of my favorite movies, “A Simple Plan.” Below is the result:

“Film noir is a genre of crime film that emerged in the 1940s and 1950s, characterized by its gritty, dark, and morally ambiguous themes. The genre often features hard-boiled detectives, femme fatales, and criminal protagonists, and is known for its use of chiaroscuro lighting, voice-over narration, and a sense of cynicism and disillusionment.

“A Simple Plan” is a masterful example of film noir, and Raimi does an excellent job of capturing the genre’s sense of moral ambiguity. The characters in the film are not necessarily evil, but they are driven by greed and a desire for a better life. As they become more entrenched in their plan, they are forced to make increasingly difficult and morally questionable decisions, and the film explores the consequences of their actions in a gritty and realistic way.

The film’s use of lighting and cinematography is also noteworthy. Raimi makes expert use of chiaroscuro lighting to create a sense of dread and unease, and the film’s snowy, rural setting adds to the sense of isolation and danger. The film’s score and sound design are also noteworthy, as they effectively create a sense of tension and unease throughout the film.

In conclusion, “A Simple Plan” is a modern example of the film noir genre that successfully captures the genre’s sense of moral ambiguity, gritty realism and themes of greed, deception and violence. It is a must-watch for fans of the genre and for anyone interested in exploring the different facets of cinema. It’s a film that showcases the talents of its director, Sam Raimi, and its cast, Bill Paxton, Billy Bob Thornton, and Bridget Fonda, in a well-crafted story with a strong and memorable ending.”

Not bad, eh? Sure, it dropped Sam Raimi’s first name on first reference. Sure, it’s kind of repetitive and reads like an uneasy collaboration between Wikipedia and your average college freshman. Sure, there’s not a lot of humor, wordplay or obscure pop-culture references.

But it only took a minute! An added plus for me is the timely reminder that I don’t use the word “chiaroscuro” often enough. ChatGPT saw fit to use it twice in three paragraphs. Just like a real college freshman!